he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
