i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
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