Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Randomize
