just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
