Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
