Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
