I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
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