Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Randomize
