lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
