i jhust puked up my retainher.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
