K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
