Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
