Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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