What a fucking waste of an outfit
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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