You're completely useless in the revolution.
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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