One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
operation have a gay friend backfired
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
