Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
