idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
