When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize