It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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