In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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