i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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