We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
