Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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