Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
