She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
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