No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
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