Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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