I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
