somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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