do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
