bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
