i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
We left the knife in your bed.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
