The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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