that's an acceptable place to lick
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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