Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
