Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
