I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
