A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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