I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Cover your peen. We're going out.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize