the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
