check it out our google latitudes are spooning
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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