Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
