3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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