He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
either way he was missing a nipple.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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