i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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