it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
