I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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