Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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