This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
