Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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